Monday, July 27, 2009

Oh, That's Easy, I Can Do That! ... Wait, No I Can't

Over the weekend it hit me like a ton of bricks that I cannot do all the things that I'm used to. Jonathan and I kept my cousins, Kennady 6 and Logan 8, over the weekend. We took them to the park, to Wonderworks in Gatlinburg, and to the fountains and playgrounds at World's Fair Park. They are great kids and they have a lot of energy! When we went to Wonderworks the first thing they wanted to do was ride an earthquake similator. So we all get in line and then Jon points out that the sign says pregnant women can't ride. "Oh yeah, duh! I can't ride this thing. Talk about shaking baby syndrome!" I was the photographer. Well, there ended up being several things I couldn't do. I stood on the ground while they rock climbed, rode a rollercoaster similator, and also while Jon rode some thing that spun him upside down. It was fun watching them of course but I wanted in on the action! The next day we took them to World's Fair Park where they played in the water fountains and on the playground. They had a blast! I couldn't join in on the fountains afraid that I would slip and fall so I sat on a blanket under a tree while watching and shouting at them playfully. When they wanted to go to the playground I went with them and Jon stayed by the fountains. On the playground Kennady couldn't reach one of the handle bars on a piece of equipment. Logan could do it easily so she was getting frustrated. I went over to hoist her up and could barely get her off the ground. She is tiny and only weighs about 50 lbs and I couldn't pick her up well enough so that she could grab the handle bar. Pre-pregnancy I could have done this with ease. Actually about a month ago I could have done it with ease. Although I was a little bummed out by not getting to participate in some of the activities at Wonderworks and not being able to pick my six year old cousin up, it was easy to shrug the feeling of inadequacy off. I mean I'm pregnant. No woman in her third trimester is expected to do these things.
After the kids left on Sunday I decided to do some yoga before dinner. Jon sat on the couch with the computer and I sat in the floor. I hadn't done yoga for a while and was excited to start back. So, I pop in a pre-natal yoga dvd and get ready sitting cross-legged in Namaste. There were three women that I could follow. The first was the instructor, a non-pregnant twig of a woman named Sheva. The second was a woman in her second trimester named Britta. And the third was a woman in her third trimester named Poppy. (I just had to include their stereotypical hippy names) So they start and I am following the woman in her second trimester. It all starts out fine and I'm feeling good until we move to standing positions. Try balancing on one foot while stretching in your third trimester, its not a pretty sight. The women in her third trimester was using a chair so I decide to follow her. Using a chair for support I get into position. Everything is going fine. Then they move on to something else and I decide that it looks easy enough and slide the chair away following the second-tri girl again. And guess what. I couldn't do it. So, I grab the chair. Its still too hard and I hit fast-forward until I find something I think I can do. "Umm...No." Fast-forward.....Stop, Play...Fast-forward.... Finally I give up, sit on the floor and cry. Jon gets in the floor at that point and cuddles me to make me feel better. Then I fast-forward to the relaxation techniques at the end of the video.
After dinner I decide I want to take a bath. But I don't just want to take a bath, I want to take a bath with Jon. Well, I have your basic average sized tub. Without trying we knew that we no longer could fit in there together. So, I sat on the couch and cried. Jon was wonderful. He started the bath water and helped me in and then sat by the tub as I soaked. He washed my hair and talked to me until I was ready to get out. We went to bed and he lotioned my belly and talked to Jareth some. I felt much better. I decided not to push myself to do the things that I can no longer do and not to be so hard on myself. No one expects me to do these things and I shouldn't over-extend myself either. I will tackle yoga again, but with lesser expectations of myself.
Only a few more months to go!!! Though after he is here I will most likely complain that I miss being pregnant of course.

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